This is a guest blog by consultant anaesthetist Dr Sangeeta Mahajan, mental health activist and blogger.
It was a tsunami that hit and took off chunks of my heart, my reality, sanity and future with it. I was utterly unprepared for the nightmare that was about to ensue.
One sunny autumn afternoon 18 months ago, two policemen showed up at my doorstep to tell me that my son’s body had been found nearby. Apparently Saagar had ended his own life. They handed me his belongings but I was convinced they had made a mistake. This was not within the realm of possibilities.
He is a handsome talented young man of 20 with a fabulous education and everything to live for. How could this be? He had a recent diagnosis of bipolar disorder but the doctors had me believe that he was getting better. No one ever mentioned the word ‘suicide’ to me.
I was numb but something in me had a strong desire to write. Having never written or read a blog before, we set up an account and I started writing kidsaregifts the same night and have written every day since. Its my way of spending time with Saagar, healing and sharing what I learn.
Things I wish I knew
I could write a book on the things I wish I had known.
I know a few of them now but he's already gone.
I wish I'd known that self-destructive, suicidal thoughts
can come to anyone, at any time, irrespective of how good-looking, clever or
wealthy they are or what race, religion, sex or profession they belong to.
I wish I knew that suicide claims the precious lives of many
a young men every year.
I wish I knew how difficult it is for those having these
treacherous thoughts to talk about them and ask for help.
I wish I knew the accompanying shame and guilt as though it
was their own fault.
I wish I knew how unwell he was.
I wish I could see his soul invisibly bleeding to death.
I wish his doctor could see it.
I wish the medication he was put on had been the right one
for him.
I wish someone had told me the warning signs to watch out
for and recognise 'crisis' when it happened.
I wish I knew how to read into his desperation and help him
open up, feeling safe.
I wish I knew how to break through the wall of silence that
surrounded him.
I wish I knew that he meant 'suicidal thoughts' when he said
'random thoughts'.
I wish I understood his pain and confusion.
I wish I knew that despite having the world at his feet he
secretly wanted to escape from it.
I wish that I knew that even though he was my darling son
and was only 20, he could die.
Most of all I wish I knew how to think and talk about suicide.
1. For Mental Health Awareness Week 2016: http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/sangeeta-mahajan/mental-health-awareness-week_b_9865518.html
2. Telegraph: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/health/11854612/Im-a-doctor-but-that-didnt-save-my-son-from-suicide.html
3. Huffington post: http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/sangeeta-mahajan/suicide-the-silent-epidemic_b_8904102.html
4. Blog in the memory of Saagar: www.kidsaregifts.wordpress.com
"I started writing it on the day he passed away and have been writing everyday since. It helps me and I think it helps others too. I was pretty blank when I started writing it but the intention must have been to stop this from happening to other parents. It starts from day 0 in October 2014 (in archives)."
2. Telegraph: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/health/11854612/Im-a-doctor-but-that-didnt-save-my-son-from-suicide.html
3. Huffington post: http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/sangeeta-mahajan/suicide-the-silent-epidemic_b_8904102.html
4. Blog in the memory of Saagar: www.kidsaregifts.wordpress.com
"I started writing it on the day he passed away and have been writing everyday since. It helps me and I think it helps others too. I was pretty blank when I started writing it but the intention must have been to stop this from happening to other parents. It starts from day 0 in October 2014 (in archives)."
***
If you or someone you love is in mental health crisis (UK), please contact the
Samaritans on 116 123.
Opening times: 24 hours, 7 days a week
Website: www.samaritans.org
Or see our Suicide Prevention Resources page on our website.
Or download the free #StayAlive Suicide Prevention App: find out more here.
Thanks for sharing, I just like the valuable info you provide for your articles. I’ll bookmark your weblog and take a look at once more right here regularly. Cheap essay writing service will give you opportunity to spend more free time with friends.
ReplyDeleteGreat Article Cyber Security Projects projects for cse Networking Security Projects JavaScript Training in Chennai JavaScript Training in Chennai The Angular Training covers a wide range of topics including Components, Angular Directives, Angular Services, Pipes, security fundamentals, Routing, and Angular programmability. The new Angular TRaining will lay the foundation you need to specialise in Single Page Application developer. Angular Training
DeleteGreat work. Thanks for sharing this article. It will be blasting moment for me to be here. Amazing. Custom Essay Writing Service
ReplyDeleteAmazing. I liked this article. Great work. This is something that can be motivated. Well done. Do my Essays
ReplyDeleteOn the off chance that you are by and by in threat of submitting suicide, at that point there are proactive measures you can take to anticipate it. The adapting techniques underneath cover it in more detail, however here are a couple of the fundamental focuses to consider.עורך דין פלילי
ReplyDeleteInteresting article! Thank you for sharing them! I hope you will continue to have similar posts to share with everyone! I believe a lot of people will be surprised to read this article!
ReplyDeleteRef: Best essay writing service
MegaCast – Chromecast player is a very useful tool with which you can solve some accounting problems
ReplyDeleteMegaCast For Pc
Obtaining Cheap Nursing Writing Services is fulfilling for most students who have to struggle with deadlines for their Nursing Assignment Writing Services and Nursing Coursework Writing Help Services.
ReplyDeleteWhen students seek our Online Nursing Case Study Writing Services from us, they are assured to receive the best Nursing Case Study Help Services that meets all their writing needs and Nursing Research Paper Services that has been written following all the instructions.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteAre you entitled to a free eye test? under the NHS, you may be entitled to a unfastened eye take a look at, read our manual to make certain you don’t spend cash in case you don’t ought to. it is important so that you can have regular eye examinations. this could make certain that your prescription is up to date and that your eyes stay Boots Eye Test Voucher. Can i am getting a free eye test? whether or not or not you could get a free eye test relies upon for your age, the modern situation of your eyes and private situations. unique concessions are commonly made for kids, older people, the blind and those receiving government help are some of the major corporations entitled to a free eye take a look at at the NHS.
ReplyDeleteHowdy! This article could not be written any better! Going through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He continually kept preaching about this. I most certainly will forward this post to him. Fairly certain he'll have a great read. I appreciate you for sharing!
ReplyDeletePSN Codes
Roblox Asset Downloader
Roblox Music Codes
Through your presence, many patients can get rid of different diseases and I think, this is a good step towards health, and we should do such kind of affective works. Coursework writing services.
ReplyDeleteac market
ReplyDeleteac market apk
acmarket
acmarket apk
It is important for medical science research paper service students to seek Medical Science Assignment Help from a reputable custom medical science writing company so as to be assured of good grades in their medical science essay writing services.
ReplyDeleteThose seeking education assignment writing services have an advantage of hiring online education assignment writers who are familiar with research papers on teaching & education for their Online Education Assignment Help.
ReplyDeleteE-commerce research paper writers are hard to come across them for those in need of E-commerce Essay Writing Services and trade and e-commerce writing services.
ReplyDeleteThe primary role of the Meraki SD Wan Engineer usually revolves around the design and implementation of Meraki SD-Wan configurations for Wide Area Networks. However, it may also involve customer-facing duties, such as being the technical expert in the room amongst a sales team for an SD-Wan service provider, offering advice, and working to improve existing networks.
ReplyDeleteOnline medical research paper writing services are very difficult to complete and many students are always searching for Medical Assignment Writing Services to help them complete their medical coursework writing services and medical research paper services.
ReplyDeleteIt is important for biology coursework writing service students to seek Biology Essay Writing Services from a reputable biology research paper service provider for their biology assignment writing services.
ReplyDeleteOnline law research paper help services are very common nowadays since there are very many students seeking Law Research Writing Services and law essay writing services.
ReplyDeleteOnline psychology essay writing services are very difficult to complete and many students are always searching for Help with Psychology Coursework Writing services to help them complete their psychology research paper writing services and psychology case study writing services.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate the time you’ve taken out to show me the ropes and ensure that I have the required knowledge to do a great job. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteread more
The ultimate goal of descriptive essay help services is to provide Descriptive Essay Writing Services and descriptive essay services since descriptive essay writing help seekers lack time to complete their custom descriptive essay writing services.
ReplyDeleteStudents find Human Resource Writing Services as being of great assistance since they are able to complete their human resource assignment writing services and human resource research paper writing services on time.
ReplyDeleteTo get 123 HP DeskJet 3830 default production line settings, you should think about the 123.hp.com/dj3830 hard reset. Find out about the HP DeskJet 3830 printer hard reset framework in detail. Get comprehensive insights concerning the default manufacturing plant settings and more about your 123.hp.com/dj3830 printer arrangement.
ReplyDeleteIt is important for neurobiology coursework writing help seekers to find the best Neurobiology Writing Services from a reputable neurobiology research paper writing service provider for their custom neurobiology essay writing services.
ReplyDeleteFinding the social psychology coursework writing services and Social Psychology Writing Services is not easy unless one is keen to establish a reputable social psychology assignment writing service provider & social psychology research writing services.
ReplyDeleteThere are many theology & religion coursework writing services and Religious Research Writing Services to choose from for those stuck with their religion assignment writing services and theology essay writing help services.
ReplyDeleteIt is important to seek medical coursework writing services and medical research paper writing services since students find help when they visit Medical Research Writing Services.
ReplyDeletehy
ReplyDeletethanks for sharing this blog
plz visit 123movies
It is important for business management assignment help seekers to find the best Business Management Writing Services from a reputable business management paper writing service provider for their custom business management essay services.
ReplyDeleteThere are reliable PowerPoint Presentation Writing Services that are very popular for students in search of powerpoint presentation preparation services and pay for powerpoint presentations.
ReplyDeleteDid you know that you can easily view the contents of your phone on your TV without a cable? With a screen mirror app you can easily do the screen mirroring from Android to TV. Check out www.screenmirroring.me to find out more.
ReplyDeleteThis is nice blog.
ReplyDeleteBusiness Life Cycle
Anyview Cast is a screen mirroring app that is designed to connect every Android mobile phone to a smart TV without a cable. No smart TV? No problem. Anyview Cast also works with Chromecast.
ReplyDeleteFacebook Video Downloader HD is an Android mobile app that offers the easiest way to download videos from Facebook.
ReplyDeleteEndNote Crack is the app applied for the windows users to give the hotspot. It is an excellent source for those who require high-quality data to complete and create their projects. It is one of the critical programs and the most significant cause in the market. The great thing about the software is that it is effortless and beginners can understand its tools. They can click the interface and gain the know-how about the tools without seeking any advice or tutorial. Moreover, it’s an excellent program for beginners to select their projects quickly. It gives hundreds of reference tools to make your research work.
ReplyDeleteدانلود آهنگ رضا بهرام دل
ReplyDeleteدانلود آهنگ جدید
دانلود آهنگ جدید
دانلود آهنگ قدیمی
HP Envy 5540 hardware and software setup. Download and install the 123 hp com 5540 setup software from 123.hp.com/envy5540.
ReplyDeleteHi…this is abhinav here, the few months I am visiting and following you. What I really like about you is that your writing style. Please keep making such as information for us. Top CA Firm in India – AKGVG, Top CA in India.
ReplyDeleteققنوس چت
ReplyDeleteکالاف دیوتی
میهن چت
تبریز چت
ارومیه چت
چت روم
جوک جدید
myassignmenthelp provide best
ReplyDeleteassignment help uk so go and hire thier experts and get the best result
Hi, everyone. I mostly like to spend my free time with my friends. When we are given too much homework - it really annoys me a lot. How nice that nowadays there is such a wonderful service as grademiners reviews, where literally in about three hours you write such an awesome essay that even the teacher will be shocked, and it will cost well pennies just. Usually how we ask to write an essay, I turn only to this service, he proved himself very well, and is on the market for quite a long time.
ReplyDeleteHi, ALL. I mostly like to spend my free time with internet
ReplyDeleteis you guy's struggle to find assignment help uk experts then hire myassignmenthelp experts
helpin homeworkhttps://helpinhomework.org/ the best online academic assignment writing help services all across the world. If you have no time for completing writing tasks and want to submit your assignment urgently, avail our best sociology assignment help service at a very affordable price.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for giving us space to express our feeling and thoughts about above information. I think you will keep updating and changing these information time to time if there is need to change. Transaction And Valuation Services, Audit Firms In India, Business Setup Services In India, Accounting Services, Forensic Accounting and Fraud Detection.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for giving us to express our feeling and thoughts about above information. I think you will keep updating and changing these information time to time if there is need to change. revenue assurance audit delhi, company registration in delhi online , top 10 ca company in India, read more, business advisory consulting services in india, top accounting companies in india.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this blog. It really provides awesome information to all readers. keep it up and keep posting these types of blogs on digital marketing services, it's really helpful.
ReplyDeletetop business consulting firms in India
Thanks for this blog. It really provides awesome information to all readers. keep it up and keep posting these types of blogs on digital marketing services, it's really helpful.
ReplyDeletefixed asset management companies in india
Very heartwarming article quite an emotional roller coster ride the article took the readers on i guess. However, i want to talk about something that made me feel that i should have known about all before i faced it. Quickbooks tool hub this is tool that can be utilized to remove mostly if not all the issue that a Quickbooks software faces. You might need to have all the info about different types of error and all the steps that can be taken to immediately remove them from the system.
ReplyDeleteThere are no situations without a way out. Student may get online the essay about the environment if they can't write it on their own.
ReplyDeleteIDM Crack
ReplyDeleteبرنامه بدنسازی حجمی مبتدی
ReplyDelete